I woke up this morning, and I heard the birds chattering and singing outside.  What a wonderful sound that is to hear!  It’s Spring.  We made it.  Do you feel good in the spring? It’s my favorite time of the year in the Pacific Northwest.  It’s also the time for allergies from all the trees and grasses that are permeating the air!

Allergies remind me of just one more medication I need.  How many types of medication can one person take.  I took a strong look at my kitchen yesterday.  And here is what I see…bottles and bottles of medicine, vitamins, gummy bear vitamins, calcium chews and aspirin.  The other side of the box has a tall bottle of Tylenol adjacent to one bottle of Ibuprofen.  Sigh……is your house full of medications?

Its just one thing after another.  Now my diabetes is acting up.  I currently take three types of medication for that, because I have been resisting insulin.  Now I am beginning to rethink that option.  If I could give up two of the pills, maybe I would try it. I guess though, there is no trying it cause you just get on it and do that from then on.

This is all depressing.  Honestly, I have eaten right and exercised the last three months.  Granted now I have a cold, and my blood sugar has been high.  but then it has been high ever since all this started 18 months ago.  Tamoxifen made it the worst.  Even though I quit that, the sugar remains high.  Why does all this stuff have to go wrong at once?  I guess I should be making recommendations here for what to do..because I have to remember my goal:  to help other people on their journey.  To maybe pave a path, that will make somebody else’s life a little easier.  Remember the goal.  Stay focused.

So what can I do?  Diabetes and cancer are kind of linked.  But recently I read articles that said cancer really is not impacted by sugar.

http://www.dana-farber.org/Health-Library/Sugar-and-Cancer-Cells.aspx

This is a good article on sugar and cancer.  Read it please. It has some good information.  Fresh fruits and vegetables are very good for cancer patients.  The article references 12 grams of sugar found in a small orange and 10 grams found in a donut.  However the donut does not consider good nutrients like the orange.  The orange also has Fiber in it!  So by all means consume these good fruits and vegetables.  They have certain nutrients that actually help the immune system and block cancer agents.    That’s good news for us!  For all of us, not just people with cancer or that have had cancer.  I liked the article too because it stressed not worrying because that contributes to higher blood sugars also.

Eat healthy.  Think positive and be happy.  The be happy message is so important.  it includes being kind to yourself and cutting yourself some slack for being human!  We are all jsut human and we make mistakes.  Spend less time criticizing your self and more time loving yourself.  I am doing the best I can on taking care of my health.  I will continue to do so and manage the best I can, day to day.  That’s all I can do.  The rest is in someone elses hands

Thank you God for this day!

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I really love trees.  They convey emotions to me so clearly, maybe even so more than water.    Here are some gorgeous ones that I love:  When I know what type they are I will put it in. I guess I should learn their names but I just like to look at them! Can you see a story they could tell?

Now I love the purples.  Can you imagine lying on your back on a warm 80+ degree day and staring up into these colors? How relaxing and stress relieving would that be?  Priceless.

And what about this one…mystery..intrigue..

and this one is called River Teeth.  The actual roots of the tree strengthen and guide the path of the river.  We need River Teeth when we have cancer because they hold us firm and don’t let us get swept away by the dark beneath the water.

and of course this tree…because it is the tree of Hope…the light shines through and tells us tomorrow is coming….soon

I love trees. They are a symbol of strength, of being deep rooted, of being able to stand up to the winds of time and winters of harsh cold.  They live on until removed or weakened with time and disease.  But oh how beautiful they are until then.

Have a super weekend!  Do something new….find a tree and communicate with it!

Bonnie

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Setting goals and following through, has always been hard for me.  But I decided, given the odds are greatly increased for a longer life survival if you exercise, I am going to do it!  Cancer patients need exercise.  Cancer hates oxygen.  I am going to do everything I can in my life to eradicate cancer!

First I built myself an exercise log.  This log is to keep track of when I exercise and post it on the refrigerator, so I can see it and keep myself motivated. I set myself some fitness goals.  I read in the literature, cancer patients have a 20-50 Percent chance of a non – reoccurrence if they will exercise 1 to 3 hours per week.  Well, I can do that. But will I?  I think so. Exercise Log

The second thing I purchased, is a “FUEL” band from Nike.  It has an app that runs on your mobile phone, too.  This wrist band (hey its better than wearing pink!) logs your activity and inspires you to set goals and achieve them! Check out the video, its fun and if you love new techie toys you are going to love this new toy.  I do!

http://www.nike.com/us/en_us/c/womens-training

Four months out after surgery, and I have some major issues with the left arm still but there is nothing wrong with my legs.  Yes, I have fatigue and some pain.  But the best way to deal with both of those is to walk.  Because if I walk, I have less pain later in the day and I sleep better.

In order to heal, we need to have a good nights sleep.  That has not been easy for me since getting off the pain pills in December.  I am just wide awake.  Even most of the days I exercise, I am still quite a night owl.  I have tried eliminating napping during the day.  I have eliminated caffeine for the most part, and I am eating right.  But I am not sleeping and I refuse to take sleeping pills.  At least not yet.

At night I can write.  I have been writing something or another since I was about nine.  My dream had always been to be a writer full time.  Now I am doing school work, and being at home; its the perfect time to write.  And, I have been writing nonstop when I can.  Now that I am not looking for a job, and just attending school full time (yes at this age) I have time to exercise and write.

Putting together an exercise plan was a little difficult.  I had to base it on what I could do, and work around my schedule.  I have my PT exercise to do, twice a day for about 20 minutes but they now totally bore me.   But I am continuing to do them.  I added walking about a month ago. Swinging my arm helps as I walk.  I am now doing walks everyday, rain or shine and let me tell you, we don’t get much shine in Seattle.  I think last night we had five inches of rain.  It is by far the worst day this winter….whoops…the first day of spring!

When you decide to embark on an exercise plan, it helps if you get the right tools to go along with the work!  Get yourself a nice pair of colorful athletic shoes. I got a cool pair of orange Nike’s.  Along with it, I also got a pedometer to figure out and track how far I go.  In the beginning…it was pathetic!

The other thing I found by accident, was late one night watching an infomercial.  Monteil Williams came on tv and was endorsing a product (found here http://www.tommiecopper.com).  I thought, what a bunch of baloney but then I started listening.  I had just spent 70 dollars on a compression camisole that doesn’t really work.  Here he was advertising all kinds of garments…shirts, knee supports, full body pants.  Hmmm….I took a chance and ordered a long sleeve shirt.  The only bad thing was they didn’t come in very large sizes, and I have one large breast and then nothing on the other side so everything doesn’t fit…it contorts, stretches, feels awful and I ultimately throw it off.

I decided to order one long sleeve shirt.  It came on the weekend.  I put it on yesterday. I may never take it off!  It was cheaper than at the specialty store. It fits.  It is washable and it is colorful (blue) an stylish!  It is not like the beige (I am sick) color from the store here in town.  Its fantastic and it was not as expensive either.  When you buy three, you get a third off with free shipping.  I never, by the way, endorse products but this works! I highly recommend them.  Wow, what relief. I walked in it yesterday, and it was so supportive. AND I slept last night!!Adding a nice hat helps with the attitude also.

Its not all magic, and there are no simple answers, but find yourself a tool set and get moving!  Even if I get 20%….that works for me!  I plan to be here awhile longer. The time to do it is now!  , Have a great day, I am off to play with my new tech toy, set my objectives and get started.  

Bonnie

The post Exercise – Fuel the Plan: The Time is Now :) appeared first on The Tree of Cancer.

1.  I remember the doctor calling and her voice saying I am sorry, it is cancer.  I was in a field walking my dogs.  Isn’t technology handy, it can bring news anywhere.

2.  I remember wondering who could I call now.  My Mom has Alzheimer’s and doesn’t know me.

3.  I remember being so scared at the first appointment with the oncologist.  Where did my regular doctor go?  Who is this guy?

4.  I remember the weeks of recovering from the biopsy.  I remember the tears.  Twenty two hours of non stop bleeding.  Just apply pressure they said.  You don’t  need pain pills.  #$)*$ them.

5.  I remember the awareness of no more feeling in that breast, after the first lumpectomy.  It was a minor relief from the pain but a horror of the reality. No feeling?  Its been four months. What are unclear margins?

6.  I remember how kind the medical people were.  I constantly needed things repeated to me. No they didn’t get it all.

7.  I remember wondering if I would ever swim again.  My left arm didn’t work right.  Was this part of it?

8.  I remember wondering who would love me looking like this, and that was after surgery number one.  I should have waited until after surgery 3 to worry about that.

9.  I remember telling the surgeon he had given me the Wal-Mart version not the Nordstrom version.  It really didn’t matter because later he had to remove it all.  Rest In Peace Lefty.

10.  I remember teeth coming loose from  the removal of throat tubes when they pulled them out.  I am suppose to be ‘positive’ and not frightened with this.

11.  I remember taking the pills to keep the terror of fear at bay.  Now I don’t dare to  not take them.  Pills became my closest friend.

12.  I remember the feeling of estrogen in my body racing, feeding the cancer and the hope that the hormone blocker would work.  The verdict is still out.

13.  I remember surfing the web and reading what my future would be.  It was scary and good.  My sense of security, stability and confidence were imploded like the destruction of a building.

14.  Most of all I remember the stupid things people said to me.  I could write a whole book on this topic.  I release them and let it go. Others, like family, just stayed away.  It all hurt.

15.  I remember when I forgave myself.

I am not writing any more about this today because I can’t quit crying.

The post 50 I Remembers – Fifty feelings about Breast Cancer Diagnosis appeared first on The Tree of Cancer.

My cancer journey is new, just starting this last summer. I am continually reminded how lucky I am. Its only Stage II, hormone positive, invasive without lymph node involvement. It will only be a lumpectomy and you will be on your way to radiation, and home free. I can do this I thought. No problem.

Well just like the cancer came unannounced in the night like a thief, it didn’t work out to be one lumpectomy either. The sneaky little cells just wouldn’t give up the good fight. Okay, ‘it will just be one more lumpectomy’ and then you’ll be done. Nope. Bad margins again. You will come to learn these terms. Its amazing how cancer or disease can increase your vocabulary almost overnight.

After the third try, it was determined I had to have a total mastectomy. Now there is an interesting word, because I was told I had already had the mastectomy earlier…turns out it was only partial. Read up on mastectomies for late night horror reading. Sigh….how many ways to remove a breast!

The strange thing for my case, and I don’t mean to be sarcastic or flip here, because it is a serious topic, but my cancer was here and gone before I even adjusted to the fact I had cancer. They tell me now, it is gone. But, it isn’t over, until it’s over. I have to take hormone therapy treatment for five years. More on that later. So, supposedly, and I guess I believe it, yes I believe it, my cancer was removed. I still have what caused it though, high levels of estrogen. I still have one more breast. It’s supposed to be okay. But there comes this little word…doubt. It hides and lurks in the shadows at night. That’s what cancer does best…cause fear.

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